The Magician Wants Normality – Chapter 06

Chapter 06 – Lecture And Punishment Are Necessary

“As I said, if you guys are knights, you’re supposed to refrain from doing such shameful behavior, right?”

I lectured the kneeling knights with a smile.

Although the nearby villagers surrounded us and watched from a distance, there were some that nodded in agreement.

Current location: Genoa Village.

And this really strange scene right here had developed into this about an hour ago.

※※※※※

After the incident.

We rolled up the Shady Squad into bamboo mats, and safely arrived at our destination with them thrown into the back of the wagon.

The knights pulled the wagon, tied to it with their arms restricted.

Our speed dropped in addition to the tremendous increase in luggage so it wasn’t a problem.

The doctor kept quiet, not saying anything, so it appears that he agrees with my treatment of them.

I mean, wouldn’t you feel sorry for the horse despite the increase in luggage?

Our luggage was, of course, five of the Shady Squad. They’re objects, these guys1.

…You knights, your value is less than the horse that works.

Don’t expect any human rights, the difference isn’t that great so be our running laborers.

And when we arrived at the village, we found out that the knights and the attackers have caused trouble here as well.

“The knights complained about the inn they stayed at from beginning to end.”

Don’t expect much from this remote of a village, both of you.

“We even had to protect everyone when those guys over there attacked.”

Thank you for your hard work. So the knights quickly escaped, huh?

“I was threatened to tell them where the knights escaped to… Even though I didn’t know…”

So that’s the reason the number of wounded people increases, huh? The doctor who was quietly treating everyone looked scary.

…Knights and Shady Squad, are you guys ready?

“I was made into a shield as well. No one minds me lecturing them, right?”

“Though it might be a little noisy,” I said with a smile, and having gotten my approval from everyone, I spoke to the knights.

“First off, please kneel and sit. This is called a seiza, a traditional way of sitting down. Next, put your hands together in front of you, and bow.”

This is what’s called prostrating yourself on the ground. If you’re going to apologize, this is how you do it.

“We’re knights! For that kind of behavior…!”

“But you can do it, right?”

“For us nobles, we can–“

“You said you can, right?”

“…”

“…If your bodies can’t apologize, then I’ll have to live up to your expectations…”

Jolt!

“Got it?” After saying that, the knights both looked at each other.

“WE’RE VERY SORRY!!”

They prostrated themselves with great force, and apologized.

Obedient people are the best. If you don’t want knights to get a bad impression, you have to apologize right here, right now.

You knights are sooo easy to understand.

For sure, they realized the power relationship between us as:

Me >>>>> (Barrier they couldn’t pass through)>Shady Squad>Themselves

But above all, what convinced me the most was that they understood this even without their bodies remembering the pose.

Huh? I don’t care about social status, you say?

The knights might be a class higher than civilians, but so what?

Even if I did realize they’re noble-like, but so what?

I know all of that, and and still treating them like this. For an experienced other world trip traveler like me, political power and lèse-majesté aren’t enough to scare me!

I’ll gladly take on ambushes, increasing my intellectual power, physical strength and fortune using magic.

I don’t quite know this world’s class system, so I prioritize my own emotions first. Which means, ignorance is best.

There would be no need of a lecture if these two had acted like proper knights in the first place. If I had to find fault with them, it would be that.

“Let’s see, because of this, I shall lecture you both♪”

“EH–“

Eh, you’re apologizing right now, right?”

Oh no, you do know what comes after this is the most important of them all, right?

Because I need to make them properly understand that they can’t commit the same mistake.

When I told them that, one of the villagers came forward and called out.

“Hey, what’re you going to do about them?”

“Them?”

“Those guys in black.”

Ah, I completely forgot. That they were here.

But I don’t care to listen to what these knights’ mission is so I could only arrest them.

What should I do? When I thought that over, my gaze swept over the bear that was in the middle of being dismantled.

All that matters is we enjoy you~ So please quickly turn into food.

The bear… Bloodstained…

Okay, let’s go with that.

“How about we cover them in the bear’s blood, and hang them in the forest for a night?”

I said as I clapped my hands, and then inclined my head to the side.

Yeah, there’d be no point if only I agree, right?

“Since I’ll use barrier, restrict2, and healing magic on the attackers, rolled into a bamboo mat covered in the smell of blood, let’s just leave them hanged from a tree overnight.”

“You brute!”

“If I use magic on them, they won’t die even if a big carnivorous animal attacked them.”

The person who shouted was Knight No. 1. Oh my, but it’s safe, you know? Though it’ll be scary.

It’s similar to putting them, covered in blood, in a glass case.

Just that the smell permeates through so a monster– which I’m sure will be a carnivorous one– will drop in.

They won’t be able to move from the restriction magic, preventing their escape. I’ll even add in magic that conserves the whole situation3 so that the ropes can’t be cut either.

There’s a chance it’ll playfully attack the barrier so I’ll invoke the usual healing magic.

See, how exactly am I a brute?

“Wait, but that’s not…”

“Being played around by a fluffy, furry living thing is rare, you know.”

“The problem isn’t exactly that…”

“But isn’t it obvious that this meager amount of fun for me, which isn’t even that severe, is my way of showing kindness?”

“No, wait, it’s because people normally die if they get attacked by a huge carnivore! It’s not something that’s seen as fun!!”

“But the aunt who taught me how to hunt said to treat what I’m hunting like food though?”

“What kind of freaking village is that to have someone that tough!?”

Yeah, the doctor also said she was special. But it’s because of her that I can dismantle beasts now.

I mean, the person who hunted that bear is me, you know? You’re too weak.

“Besides–” He continued his words.

“There’s a chance someone might die, you know?”

“That’s true, it would be great if it only ended in an injury. There’s a chance we’ll have to silence them.”

Everyone turned quiet at the doctor’s words.

If the doctor hadn’t come here. If I wasn’t here.

I’m sure that no one wanted to consider that possibility.

“Oh well, it’s exactly for that situation that we’ll proceed with the brute plan.”

“Brute plan? Have you come up with something even more terrible than this!?”

You’re noisy, Knight No. 2. Thinking for a sorcerer is hard work you know.

“It’s basically the same. Just that I’ll put an incision on the rope they’re tied with, allowing them to experience the heart-throbbing experience of hovering between life or death. The only thing keeping all of it together would be the rope they’re wrapped in! They’ll be covered in barriers so it’s useless even if they’re swallowed whole.”

“…You’re the worst, you woman with no conscience.”

“They haven’t had a wonderful experience of knowing life’s worth, though their chance of returning alive is fifty percent.”

“Do you not know the words going easy on someone…?”

Only the doctor sighed deeply in the middle of the frightened murmuring of the pale knights.

“Mizuki’s way of doing things is extreme, but that’s because the people who should be taking care of this are useless…”

Please say it a little louder, doctor. The knights are really freaking useless.

…In a fit of anger, I stepped on them, their legs numb from sitting down.


Notes

  1. In Japanese, the kanji for luggage is 荷物 where 物 means object/things. So it works as well, but just a little tidbit.
  2. Word used exactly is arrest/capture, but restrict works fine as well as like an umbrella term.
  3. Rikai-kun is giving me maintaining the status quo but this works out.
  4. Sentai in Japanese.

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